


Be sure to taste your words before you spit them out

by FlyingMonkey



Series: Ambreigns One Shots [2]
Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Breaking Up & Making Up, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, Kayfabe Compliant, M/M, Misunderstandings, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 08:46:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5737186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingMonkey/pseuds/FlyingMonkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Having a secret relationship with your best friend can be frustrating.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Be sure to taste your words before you spit them out

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! Here I am again bringing you some Ambreigns :D  
> I had the idea of writing an Ambreigns story with them like fighting and making up, and then SmackDown from Dec 31st happened and I wanted to write something about that because I legit thought they were going to kiss lol anyways this is what came out of it. This can be read as a continuation of my first one shot, but you don't have to read it to know what's going on, although I would love you if you did lol  
> Comments are very appreciated :)

Dean and Roman made their way up the ramp after SmackDown ended, taking the time to sign autographs and take pictures with some fans. Dean was tired and wanted nothing more than to go back to the hotel and fall asleep, but this was one of his favorite parts: to get to somehow give back to all the fans that cheered him on every time he was out in the ring. They both lifted their titles one last time before going backstage. Dean found it funny how Roman was still holding the title upside down, but his best friend didn't seem to notice or care. He still couldn’t believe that they were both finally champions and that they got to do it together as well.

Once they were in the locker rooms Dean made sure it was only the two of them in there; he needed to talk to Roman about what he did, or almost did, back there at ringside.

"Were you going to kiss me out there?" Dean asked.

Earlier, after the match ended and they had to brawl with Sheamus and Owens before the end of the show, Roman had taken his face between his large hands and for a second there Dean thought he was going to kiss him. In front of the crowd and the cameras.

"Sorry," Roman said as he put his bag down on a bench, and turned to look at Dean "I got carried away, but I stopped in time" He shrugged.

"Rome we gotta be careful," Dean said.

They had been a couple now for some months and keeping it a secret was a pain in the ass, but Dean knew it was necessary. He couldn't even imagine what would happen if someone was to find out about them.

"You mean I can't kiss you right now?" Roman teased, flashing Dean one of his devastating smiles and pulling him closer by the waist. Dean wanted to say yes, but he had to say no. For maybe the first time in his life Dean was doing what he thought was the right thing to do.

"Nope," He responded simply, untangling himself from Romans strong arms.

Roman sighed and they were silent for a moment. Dean stole a quick glance at him but couldn't really tell what was going through his mind.

"I'm just tired of this," Roman said finally, turning so that he was facing Dean again. Dean did the same so that they could be face to face. “Tired of having to pretend, of not being able to hold your hand or hug you or kiss you whenever we’re in public.”

“I know, but think about what would happen if someone found out?” Dean tried to reason with Roman. It seemed that lately they were having the same argument and Dean didn’t know what to do about it.

“Dean, we’re not the only couple around here, and we won’t be the last one either.” Roman retorted. Dean could see how tired Roman was of this argument as well, and it made him want to just scream at the world that they were together.

“You know is not the same Rome,” Dean said. He tried to walk towards the showers, but Roman grabbed his hand.

“Why? because we’re both guys?” Roman was starting to sound angry and Dean didn’t want to have a fight about this, again.

“Yes,” Dean said. He tried to move his hand out of Roman’s grip, but the older man only squeezed him even harder. “Let. go,” Dean said, he was starting to get angry too.

“Is it really that important to you what other people say? Can’t you just try? Unless you're ashamed or something…” Roman raised his voice, letting go of Dean’s hand and clenching his fists by his side.

“Don’t say shit like that” Dean couldn’t believe Roman was saying that stuff. It only made him angrier, but mostly he knew they were both just frustrated about the situation.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Roman said, trying to sound calm even though Dean could see how angry he was.

“What are you saying?” Dean said, getting in Roman’s face.

“I’m saying,” Roman replied, sighing. “That I don’t want to do this anymore”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Now you’re just gonna break up with me?” Dean said bitterly. He didn’t want this at all.

“I am not breaking up with you,” Roman said firmly. “I’m just telling you, I want us to stop hiding”

“And if I don’t want to?” Dean asked stubbornly. They were both close to actually hitting each other now.

“Then, yes” Roman answered.

“Yes, what? You’ll break up with me?” Dean laughed humorlessly. “We’re giving each other ultimatums now?” He shook his head and sighed.

“It’s a choice,” Roman said.

“Well you shouldn’t have to make me choose, in fact, you should already know what I’m choosing,” Dean said. 

“If you’re saying you choose to keep this a secret then I'm sorry”

“It’s that easy huh? How long have you been planning on dumping me? hmm?” Dean said crossing his arms over his chest, he knew how he sounded and the look on Roman’s face let him know just how much those words hurt him. But Dean was hurting too.

“Is that what you think of me? I can’t believe you” Roman said, shoving the clothes he had taken out of his bag back inside forcefully.

“Well you seem way too calm about this, is it really that hard to have a relationship with me? Is it really that hard that at the first struggle you’re just gonna leave? Are you that scared?” Dean practically screamed at Roman. He shoved the Samoan man back harshly, completely ready to fight him.

“Oh, I’m the scared one? Me? You’re the one that wants to keep us a secret. You’re the one that can’t handle it. I’ve told you before I don’t care what people think!” Roman told him, screamed at him. And Dean could tell he was holding back, the caring bastard didn’t want to fight him.

“But I do!” Dean screamed back. Roman stared at him, disbelief clearly on his handsome face. For a moment neither one said anything. He could see that his words had hurt Roman again, and he wasn’t really sure how to take them back.

“So it is that,” Roman asked incredulously. He sighed and grabbed his bag, he started to walk away and Dean didn’t know what to do. He was still angry and hurt, but mostly frustrated.

“Where are you going?” Dean asked. Roman threw the keys to the rental into Dean’s bag before he answered.

“To look for a ride to the next town” Dean’s eyes widened, suddenly aware that Roman was, in fact, breaking up with him. All because Dean wanted to keep the relationship secret? Because he cared about what people might say about them? Because he cared about his career? This was everything Dean had, why couldn’t Roman see that? Why couldn’t he find the words to tell him exactly what he was feeling? He didn’t know how, he only knew how to say the things that made him angry, the things that he knew would hurt his best friend. And as much as it pained him Dean said those words

“So you’re really gonna leave me huh?  What ever happened to ‘I will always be there for you’ and all that other shit huh? Was it all lies?  Why be with me if you’re just gonna abandon me the first chance you get?” Dean asked angrily.

“I’m  sorry ” Roman said simply. It looked like all of that angriness Roman had had  vanished, as if he didn’t have it in him to fight anymore, and maybe that was it, Dean thought. Maybe Roman didn’t want to fight with him (for him) anymore. Roman started to walk away, Dean followed him close until they were at the door of the locker room. 

“You know, I used to think you were different Roman. I guess I was wrong, you’re just like everyone else!” Dean all but hissed as Roman exited the room “You’re just like Seth!” He yelled out. Roman stopped in his tracks and turn back to look at him.To his  credit he didn’t flinch, but Dean could see it on his face; he could see the way those words hurt him, probably more than anything Dean had ever said to him. Dean knew he was looking at Roman with that look that made people back away from him, the look that made others call him crazy or look at him with pity or fear, the look that made others think he was a ticking time bomb; and he was reminded of how Roman never looked at him that way, how he never thought of him as crazy, and even when he did call him that it wasn’t the same. Dean swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat, willing his eyes not to spill the tears that were already there. He wanted to take his words back, everything he said, but he couldn't. Roman shook his head a bit and continued walking without saying a word back.

Dean hated what was happening, but he hated himself even more for hurting Roman. If he was honest he wanted to hate Roman too, but he knew that he couldn't hate him even if he tried. Even if Roman had hurt him too.

The drive back to the hotel was uneventful and Dean was starting to feel the loneliness settling in. He looked at the IC Title on the passenger seat and sighed. They had finally accomplished something big, they were both champions and now they weren’t even together. Dean shook his head and banged his fist on the steering wheel, he gripped it tightly and cursed under his breath.

When he got into the room he saw that Roman’s things were still there. He didn’t know if Roman was going to come and get them or if he was going to send someone for them. He threw his bag on the ground and started to kick it as hard as he could, he punched the bed and threw the pillows all over the place. He took off his jacket and threw it on the couch. Then he took off his shoes and threw himself on the bed, angrily punching it. When he felt like he had let out all of his frustrations he proceeded to take a shower.

He showered and then stayed under the warm spray of the water for about 20 minutes. Moving felt like such a hard thing to do. He passed his hands through his face and resisted the urge of punching the bathroom wall. He stepped out of the shower, wrapping himself in a towel, and stood before the sink looking at himself in the mirror. He gripped the sink as tears started to roll down his face and he couldn’t help but think that everything that was happening was his fault. He couldn’t help but think that it was him the one who had pushed Roman away. And, as sad as it made him, he couldn't help but think that it was for the best; that Roman deserved better than him, that Roman deserved someone who could give him what he wanted, someone who wasn’t as fucked up as Dean. Truth was, Dean had never felt like he was worthy of being with Roman, he still didn’t understand why Roman was with him, didn’t understand why they were friends in the first place. But Dean was selfish, and he made sure he stayed with Roman as much as he could, because even if he felt like he didn’t deserve Roman, Roman had chosen him and given him his love and Dean made sure to be with him for as long as Roman would have him. Because that was what Roman wanted and Dean just wanted to make him happy. 

He washed his face once he stopped crying and he got out of the bathroom. He changed into a tank top and boxers and was about to try to go to sleep when there was a knock on the door. He jumped to his feet, and stood by the bed for about a minute, his heart was racing and he was scared because he didn’t know if he wanted it to be Roman. He took a deep breath and walked to the door, checking through the peephole he saw that it was him. Roman.

He opened the door slowly and looked at him, it hadn’t even been that long and Dean already missed the other man. He stepped aside and let Roman walk in, neither saying anything. They didn’t have to, Dean knew Roman was here just to get his things. He saw Roman pause for a moment to look at the state of the room, it looked like he wanted to say something but he held back. As Roman started to collect his things Dean sat on the bed looking at the man that somehow had become the most important person in his life. And he decided that he needed to tell Roman exactly why he wanted to keep their relationship a secret, and also apologize for the things he said. Dean didn’t know where to begin, though, and he saw his chances slipping away once Roman was done.

“You are nothing like him” Dean blurted out, he needed to at least let Roman know that he hadn’t meant to say that. That he hadn’t meant to say most of those hurtful things.

Roman looked at him sighing, he looked tired and hurt, and it made Dean’s  heart ache . 

“Dean…”

“No, Roman. Let me talk” Dean said cutting Roman off. He pleaded silently and Roman gave him a small nod. Dean sighed and tried to think of everything he wanted, needed, to say.

“Look I’m not good at this… talking about feelings crap ok?,” Dean admitted, “I mean you already know that but…” He scratched his neck and took a deep breath before he continued. Roman only stood there in front of him, watching him silently.

“If I said what I said was because I was angry at you, and me, and frustrated. He will never be half the man that you are. Honestly, I have never met anyone as incredible as you and it hurts to know that we have to break up for stupid shit. But you must know that I don’t really care about what other people might say about me” Dean confessed.

“I don’t understand. Earlier you said that was the reason” Roman said confused.

“No. I mean yeah, but it’s more than that. It’s just… I sort of care you know? You have to care at least a little bit.” Dean said, and then he added in a softer voice “To me it’s more about you than me”

“What do you mean?” Roman asked, rising an eyebrow at him.

“I mean… ugh…” Dean let out a breath and went to sit on the bed, he padded the spot next to him; Roman followed. They were sitting next to each other for about a minute, and Dean appreciated the fact that Roman wasn’t pushing him to talk. Then he began talking again, looking straight ahead instead of Roman.

“I mean that I don’t really care about what they say about me, but you? Shit Roman, you already get so much fucking crap as it is” He said shaking his head and clenching his fists in anger. He still didn’t understand why so many people were against Roman, and he didn’t think he could ever understand it. “I don’t get it, but you do. Now imagine what’s gonna happen if they know about us? It’s messed up, but that’s the world we live in. I know you say you don’t care, but I know you do. Maybe a little too much for your own good, and I just can’t stand the idea of seeing you hurting, wondering what you might have done wrong.” He turned and looked at Roman then, who was silently looking at the floor. Dean took his face between his hands and made Roman look at him straight in the eyes. “You haven’t done anything wrong. You’ve improved so much Roman, and you are the most loving, protective, wonderful, intelligent, caring, incredible man I have ever met. I just can’t do that to you”

Dean finished then. It surprised him a lot the fact that he had been able to say all of that, he’d never said anything like that before; that was more of a Roman thing, the “talking about feelings” stuff; not that Roman said stuff like that all the time, but he had his moments. Dean didn’t think he had to say anything, though, because Roman always knew how he felt anyway. But saying everything made him feel infinitely better. Now he just waited, he still had Roman’s face between his hands and their eyes were locked on each other. He could see a swirl of emotions cross Roman’s face, but it took him aback when Roman started laughing. He was... laughing? Dean let go of him and gave his best friend a confused look, and then he felt himself getting a bit angry.

“I’m pouring my heart out here and you decide to laugh?” Dean said, crossing his arms over his chest and putting some space between them. Roman was trying to stop his laugh, and Dean raised an eyebrow at him, wanting an explanation.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Roman said quickly. “I promise I’m not laughing at you”

“Then what are you laughing at?” Dean asked “Because there’s nothing funny about any of this”

“I know,” Roman said, this time, his tone was serious. “I’m laughing at how stupid I am. I’m laughing at how not funny any of this is. I thought you were ashamed of me or something. And I didn’t realize you cared so much, which is stupid of me. I know you care about me, I was being an idiot. I’m sorry” Roman looked at him then, his sad gray eyes made Dean want to wrap him in his arms and never let him go. So he did, coming closer to him, Dean embraced the other man. Holding him tight while Roman held him back just as tightly.

“Dean I am so sorry about earlier, but you didn’t explain anything, you just let me believe what I thought was true. I am also sorry because I know making you choose isn’t fair, and I know that there are a lot of other things we have to worry about besides what people might think. It just frustrates me you know?” Dean nodded in understanding. He drew back a bit so that he could see Roman’s face, but he still held onto his shoulders. “For someone who claims he’s not good at this, that was one hell of a speech,” Roman said smiling. Dean smiled back. And then Roman pulled him close and kissed him, slow and passionate, and full of emotion and everything they still haven’t said to each other. His hands were fisted on Roman’s long hair, while Roman’s hands were wrapped around Dean’s waist, pulling him as close as he could. They ended up in the middle of the bed, Dean was on his back and Roman was hovering over him, lazily making out. After a while they were laying in bed, no longer kissing but still holding onto each other. Dean was still on his back while Roman was more or less on top of him. Dean loved every moment he got to enjoy with Roman, but it was moments like these that made his heart swell with love and appreciation for the other man. Moments like that when Roman didn’t wear his “tough guy” mask that didn’t fool Dean one bit. Not that Roman wasn’t tough because he was, but he was so much more than that, and Dean loved being the one who got to see all of those other sides of him.

“So what now?” Roman suddenly asked. They still had to reach some sort of agreement on the matter. Dean didn’t want to fight over that (or anything else really) ever again.

“We  compromise ” Dean said looking down at Roman who had his head laying on top of Dean’s chest, caressing his belly with his hand.

“What do you propose?” Roman questioned.

“Maybe we could tell only people that matter, like let’s not make this a big deal you know?” Dean answered.

“Like who?”

“We have to tell the boss don’t we?” Dean  said , “And maybe your family?”

“ OK ,” Roman said simply “Speaking of family, I need to tell Jimmy that I’m gonna stay here. He must be wondering what’s taking me so long”

“If he knows we got into a fight earlier he must think we’re punching each other by  now ,” Dean said, and Roman sat up almost immediately.

“Shit, you’re  right ,” Roman said pulling his phone out of his pocket. Dean laughed at that while Roman got up and dialed Jimmy’s cell phone number.

“No, we are not fighting” Dean heard Roman said and it made him laugh again. Roman walked out to the balcony of the room and Dean started to pick up the pillows and put them on the bed.

They needed to figure out how they were going to break the news to their boss, he hoped that their relationship wouldn’t be an issue. Dean loved his job and he feared he could lose it all, especially now that he was a champion. He was equally worried about Roman, who had had a very rough year.

“Done” Roman said entering the room again. Dean nodded and got into bed, watching as Roman stripped from his jeans and t-shirt, and got into bed as well. They kissed some more and then Roman reminded Dean that they needed to get up early in the morning to go to the next town, Dean frowned a little but reluctantly agreed on going to sleep. He turned on his side and Roman immediately pull him close to his chest. Dean put his hand on top of Roman’s on his waist and closed his eyes.

“Night Dean” Roman said giving him a small kiss on the back of his head “I love you”

“Love you too Rome, good night”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked this and thank you for reading! Sorry for any mistakes, feel free to correct me in anything XOXO


End file.
